Things I Never Want To Hear on TV Again

I'm not ashamed to admit that I watch a lot of TV and most of it is craptastic viewing. So this will probably become an ongoing list but here are the first and biggest offenders.

1. That's what I'm talkin' about!

2. I'm lovin' it.

3. Live from New York, it's Saturday Night!

Pissing Me Off Today

the obese woman on the train this morning who didn't think it would be necessary for her to move out of the doorway when the train stopped at 34th street to let half the passengers off the car. I wonder what would have happened if I shouted out loud what I was thinking in my head - "Move it fat ass"!

my morning coffee-cart guy who is MIA today. Not only does he sell the best coffee in this neighborhood but he is conveniently located directly outside my building entrance. This weak crap I was forced to go out of my way for is no substitute.

the mindless PR tool whose idiotic emails I have to take time to respond to.

It's really turning out to be one hell of a morning!

S.H.I.T. ...

So Happy Its Thursday!

Here's a collection of random thoughts (read between the lines, I'm too hungover to manage anything more cohesive).

My favorite Wednesday night watering hole was crowded last night. That's the first and hopefully last, time I've ever seen it so full. Those of us that arrived early and made the mistake of grabbing a few extra chairs for the late arrivals, spent entirely too much time and energy defending those empty seats. Some at my table blamed me for the crowd stating that I had talked about said bar too many times here on pop-o-matic. While I'd love (and plan) to think that I had that sort of influence, the fact remains that it was too crowded.

Dear Painfully Loud Woman On the Train This Morning,
No one, including the poor sap you were riding with, wants to hear you gabbing about your job with a literary agent. If you had taken the time to dislodge your head from your own ass, you would have noticed the gradual and consistent tide of people retreating from your general vicinity.


Dear Person With Horrible Gas On the Train This Morning,
I'd like to assume you were the same person as I mentioned above but that's only because I hat the person mentioned above. Please, for the sake of everyone else forced to share a commute with you, get yourself to a doctor and have that problem looked into. It was apparent to most, but you I guess, that something is not right with your innards.


Dear Me,
Finishing all the floater limoncellos on the table is not a good idea. You had one of your own and should have left it at that.

Something Going Around

I started experiencing the symptoms last week and thought I kicked this bug over the weekend. Now its Monday and I have a full blown case of busy bee syndrome. What really sucks, I just looked at my calender and I think I'm going to be stuck with this horrible wave of workingitus for the next two weeks!

Summer is supposed to be laid back, leave early, do little season, so what gives? For the first time in my life I think I may actually mean it when I say "I need a vacation".

Something That Peeves Me

When a person walks into an establishment that requires them to order something over a counter (i.e. deli, bodega, food cart, concession stand, fast food joint, etc.) and they begin the order with the words "Let me get".

I Gave At The Office

The other day I set out to take care of a few errands - haircut, drugstore, and sandwich shop - all conveniently located on the same block. Since that super convenient block is just one block away from my apartment I decided I could survive outdoors for this short period without my life-soundtrack so I left the iPod at home. Big mistake!

It turns out, I wasn't the only one with business to attend to on that block. The area was crawling with petition pricks. I know they are just doing their jobs. I actually met a lovely girl over the weekend who actually did this job once. But that doesn't change the fact that I am not interested in anything someone on the street wants to tell me. It doesn't matter if they have tickets to the funniest comedienne of all time, want to tell me about senator so-and-so's position on abortion, have free samples of a revolutionary new shampoo or are saving the environment - I'm not interested!

That doesn't mean I'm not interested in those causes, after all, who wouldn't want a revolutionary new shampoo plus, I'm already doing my part to save the environment - I use CFC bulbs and public transportation and only put the AC on when its hot outside. I'm just leery of any stranger that stops me on the sidewalk because no matter how the pitch starts, I know its going to end with them asking for money, which in my book is panhandling.

So anyway, one of the donation vultures was set up right in front of the place where I get my haircut and without my iPod, I couldn't play it off as if I was so into my music I was magically transporting out of my body and therefore there is no way I could even notice him. Fortunately, since he was standing right by the Salon (its more of a barber shop than a salon) I could prove that I wasn't lying when I said I had an appointment and couldn't stop. Unfortunately, he would still be there when I left. I tried to stall hoping the guy would reach his quota or just give up and leave but if I asked the woman cutting my hair to take any more off the sides, I would leave there looking like Butters from South Park. So I left and to my delight, the guy was busy with another sucker. I hi-tailed it around the corner and took the longest, most out-of-the way route back to my apartment.

I'd like to say that I learned a valuable lesson that day but the truth is, I haven't learned a thing.