Showing posts with label Golden Girls. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Golden Girls. Show all posts

Thursday, June 07, 2007

Outside Its Wednesday, Inside Its Thursday

Unfortunately, tomorrow this morning is another one of those days that somedickbody expects me to do work first thing in the morning. What sort of a person schedules a meeting for 9:00am?

With that in mind, I decided to write this post last night so I wouldn't leave the 5s of people that read this blog hanging. Of course, this presents me with an interesting dilemma - what if something remarkable happens after I publish this post.

Right now (Wednesday night) I'm just sitting at home drinking a few beers and watching the Golden Girls, speaking of which, was Rose suffering from dementia? She gives ding-bats a run for their money and I find it hard to believe that she wasn't touched in the head. Anyway, suppose after publishing this and polishing off a few more beers a mysterious stranger shows up at my door and hands me a pack of cigarettes with a USB drive containing the details of a sinister agency's plans to take-over the Madison Square Park Shake Shack so that they can administer a toxin in the hot dogs that will cause any New Yorkers who eat the dogs to go crazy and run amok through the Home Depot on 23rd street.

It would be my civic duty to take those plans to the proper authority. By the time I figured out who the proper authority was, where that authority's office was located, changed into something appropriate for high-stakes intrigue and espionage, traveled to that office, handed over the plans, answered repeated stupid questions as to how the plans came into my possesion, and finally returned home, I would barley have time for a quick nap and shower before having to head to that stupid meeting at 9:00 am.

The point of all this is, I would have experienced one of the most exciting adventures of my life but you would all be reading this long-winded claptrap assuming that my night consisted of a few beers, some old ladies on TV and then bed. So just to cover my bases, I'm going to publish tonight last night and refuse to answer my door.