Men At Work

I've got something big in the works for pop-o-matic. Stay tuned for the official announcement coming any day now.

Genius At Work #6

Occasionally I have ideas that I think can make the world a better place to live in. Lacking the manufacturing capabilities to bring my ideas to fruition, they usually go to waste in my mind. So I've decided to post my ideas here in the hopes that some mega corporation will stumble across them and throw bucket loads of cash at me to turn these ideas into reality. Of course, the mega corporations will probably just steal my ideas and screw me but at least I'll have the proof to back up my "hey that was my idea" rantings.

Personally, I find the whole concept of spending money on a device that simulates the experience of popping bubble wrap to be ridiculous and beyond unnecessary. However, I have to applaud the person that came up with the idea and actually convinced someone to invest and manufacturer the PuchiPuchi (pictured).

What makes the PuchiPuchi even more shocking, is that it is from the toy company, Bandai, makers of Power Rangers action figures and Tamagotchi pets. Perhaps PuchiPuchi signals a whole new direction for the toy company into the category of unnecessary crap. With that in mind, I'd like to pitch them my idea for the Stapleless Stapler Banger.

Is there anything more rewarding than stapling papers together with a forceful whack to your desk stapler? Of course there isn't! But what to do when you have nothing to staple together? Enter the Stapleless Stapler Banger! This device looks just like a conventional stapler but doesn't have any staples loaded, which allows you to bang away all day without wasting paper. Not only revolutionary, the Stapleless Stapler Banger is a great stress-reducing gizmo and will make the perfect gift for college grads who are stupid enough to take a job immediately following graduation.

Genius At Work #5

Occasionally I have ideas that I think can make the world a better place to live in. Lacking the manufacturing capabilities to bring my ideas to fruition, they usually go to waste in my mind. So I've decided to post my ideas here in the hopes that some mega corporation will stumble across them and throw bucket loads of cash at me to turn these ideas into reality. Of course, the mega corporations will probably just steal my ideas and screw me but at least I'll have the proof to back up my "hey that was my idea" rantings.

I can't imagine working for a company that forced me to wear a suit every day. I don't mind occasionally wearing one, as long as it isn't July, but I refuse to wear neckties. With that said, however, I have to admit there is one major advantage to wearing suits - it makes getting dressed really easy. All you have to do is pick the suit plus a shirt to match and presto chango! You are ready to go.

When you can wear whatever you want to work, within tasteful limits, choosing what to wear becomes a little more difficult. I'm not trendy or big on fashion but I want to make sure that I leave the apartment every day wearing something that matches and doesn't make me look like a fool. The problem is that's easier said than done.

So here is my latest invention - the Daily Recommending Ensemble Service or DRES. DRES is a web-based application that resides on your desktop like a daily weather widget. You begin customizing DRES by creating categories, such as work, nightlife, restaurant (fancy) restaurant (casual), then enter the UPC number from your clothes into the system (one way to make this process easier would be a USB scanner). Using the UPC number, the DRES will locate your clothing on the interewebs and store a picture with details in your virtual closet.

Whenever you need an outfit, simply open DRES and select a category then DRES will recommend a full ensemble from undies to jacket and everything in between. The beauty of DRES is that it's web-enabled so whatever it suggests will be tailored to the weather forecast for that day.

Other added features include the ensemble memory system which will store your previous ensembles to make sure you don't wear the same thing twice in one week or ever in front of particular people (this could be very handy when dating so that you never wear a repeat outfit). Additionally, your DRES will frequently scan the internets and let you know when clothing items you may be interested in are on sale.

So there's my idea. Now who wants to buy it and produce it (hopefully soon because I'm tired of dressing myself)?

Genius At Work #3

Welcome to my irregular posting, 'Genius At Work'. This is where I share my ideas that I think can change the world.

Unarguably, one of the greatest inventions of the 20th is the motion-sensor activated toilets, sinks and hand dryers found in public bathrooms. But why did the bathroom revolutionaries quit before finishing the job? We still have to physically touch the doors to get back out of the bathroom. Studies* show that 1 in 4 guys don't wash their hands after using the toilet. That means a lot of hands are going directly from dick to door.


The solution is automatic doors! The technology exists. We see it every time we go to the supermarket. So why can't bathroom doors get with the program. This way we can all be sure that we are leaving the bathroom with the same amount of germs we had going in and not picking up any new ones.




*Based on non-scientific guess.

GENIUS AT WORK

Welcome to my first semi-regular section, 'Genius At Work'!

Occasionally I have ideas that I think can make the world a better place to live in. Lacking the manufacturing capabilities to bring my ideas to fruition, they usually go to waste in my mind. So I've decided to post my ideas here in the hopes that some mega corporation will stumble across them and throw bucket loads of cash at me to turn these ideas into reality. Of course, the mega corporations will probably just steal my ideas and screw me but at least I'll have the proof to back up my "hey that was my idea" rantings.

My first idea is one I've shared with friends to mixed reactions. Its CheeseUp, cheese flavored ketchup. If your first reaction to that concept was "gross" or "that's disgusting", then you've probably never had cheese fries or a Philly cheese steak. You see, the problem is, melted cheese and ketchup just don't mix. Try dipping a cheese-covered French fry into ketchup - the ketchup just doesn't stick. Now imagine dipping that fry into one sauce that combines the taste and flavor of both ketchup and cheese. The result is pure deliciousness!

Come on #2 ketchup maker Hunts. You’ve been searching for a way to beat Heinz for years and this could be it.

Thanks for reading my first Genius At Work posting. Check back here often because you never know when another idea will seep from my brain and onto the web.