Brawndo! It's Got What Plants Crave

In what will undoubtedly play out in some sort of self-fulfilling prophecy of doom, Mike Judge (Idiocracy) has given the licensing rights to a company to produce BRAWNDO, The Thirst Mutilator energy drink!


In addition to all the electrolytes, BRAWNDO is loaded with 200mg of caffeine per can plus Taurine, Inositol, Guarana, Potassium, and Vitamins B6, B12, and C.

Available by the case (24 - 16oz cans) from ThinkGeek for $39.99.

Spirit Airlines - Sky Pimp

I received an email from Spirit Airlines, which happens to be the worst airline that I have ever flown on, with the following subject:

"Spirit Airlines - MILF Sale - Fares From $9* Each Way"

Contrary to the subject line, as far as I can tell, the sale doesn't have anything to do with any Mother I'd Like to Fuck. Sounds like a blatant example of false advertising to me.

Pissing Me Off Today

the obese woman on the train this morning who didn't think it would be necessary for her to move out of the doorway when the train stopped at 34th street to let half the passengers off the car. I wonder what would have happened if I shouted out loud what I was thinking in my head - "Move it fat ass"!

my morning coffee-cart guy who is MIA today. Not only does he sell the best coffee in this neighborhood but he is conveniently located directly outside my building entrance. This weak crap I was forced to go out of my way for is no substitute.

the mindless PR tool whose idiotic emails I have to take time to respond to.

It's really turning out to be one hell of a morning!

S.H.I.T. ...

So Happy Its Thursday!

Here's a collection of random thoughts (read between the lines, I'm too hungover to manage anything more cohesive).

My favorite Wednesday night watering hole was crowded last night. That's the first and hopefully last, time I've ever seen it so full. Those of us that arrived early and made the mistake of grabbing a few extra chairs for the late arrivals, spent entirely too much time and energy defending those empty seats. Some at my table blamed me for the crowd stating that I had talked about said bar too many times here on pop-o-matic. While I'd love (and plan) to think that I had that sort of influence, the fact remains that it was too crowded.

Dear Painfully Loud Woman On the Train This Morning,
No one, including the poor sap you were riding with, wants to hear you gabbing about your job with a literary agent. If you had taken the time to dislodge your head from your own ass, you would have noticed the gradual and consistent tide of people retreating from your general vicinity.


Dear Person With Horrible Gas On the Train This Morning,
I'd like to assume you were the same person as I mentioned above but that's only because I hat the person mentioned above. Please, for the sake of everyone else forced to share a commute with you, get yourself to a doctor and have that problem looked into. It was apparent to most, but you I guess, that something is not right with your innards.


Dear Me,
Finishing all the floater limoncellos on the table is not a good idea. You had one of your own and should have left it at that.

Something That Peeves Me

When a person walks into an establishment that requires them to order something over a counter (i.e. deli, bodega, food cart, concession stand, fast food joint, etc.) and they begin the order with the words "Let me get".

Where Are These Idiots

I feel like every day there's a new product released to combat (what judging by the amount of products must be the greatest threat to home safety) the dreaded Nintendo Wiimote strap issue.

Are that many people really flinging their Wiimotes into each other and their TVs? I have never dropped, flung or injured someone with my Wiimote and I'm usually half in the bag when I play Wii. If people don't have the simplest of motor skills - the ability to hold something in the hand - then they probably aren't going to be very good at any Wii games. So just save yourself some money and play checkers.