Friday, April 27, 2007

Three Cheers!


Since the first humans left the trees and their monkey ancestors (sorry creationists but pull your heads out of your asses) they have enjoyed a good stiff drink. Cromagnum people were the first to discover the enticing delights of poppy juice and the Egyptians were notorious for their month-long beer parties. The ancient Greeks and then Romans worshiped wine with Bacchanalian feasts (now there is a religion I can get behind). Even through the dark ages, when people were dropping like flies thanks to the plague, wine, beer and mead were staples of every mans diet. Columbus added "new vineyards" to his list of reasons why the Queen should finance his cruise and although our history books may credit Lewis and Clark for their adventure you can bet those two men would thank whisky for getting them through. The popularity of a good drink has only risen in modern times despite the puritan zealots who invaded our government in the 20th century and had alcohol outlawed.

Alcohol is the great unifier giving men, women, and children of all races, nationalities, religions, sexual orientations, and political backgrounds something in common (except for the crazy religions that think drinking is a sin but who really wants anything in common with those nuts?).

Where would we be today without booze? Living in a dull and dreary world that's where. Many of our most famous works of art from paintings to theatrical productions would never have been created were it not for the alcohol infused visions of the masters. When looking at the current crop of crap infesting Broadway I can say without doubt that the problem is lack of drunken creativity. Stop letting Disney and bankers create musicals and give them back to the alcoholic playwrights and drama queens who know what they are doing.

So I say that the next time you belly up to the bar, raise a glass and give a cheer to alcohol! Now would someone please pass me some aspirin because my head is throbbing from all the vodka I drank last night.

15 comments:

  1. I raise a glass to and full of alcohol just about every night. And it feels DAMN good.

    Less so in the mornings, though.

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  2. OMG!!! The drummer of Sister Kisser®™©™ and I refer to our drinking as SONGWRITING.

    We go out to many places and get lots of songwriting done.


    UPDATE: Sister Kisser®™©™ has changed our NYC gig to June 7.

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  3. Lioux, I wrote a lot of songs last night.

    June 7 works for me! Where's the gig?

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  4. Songwriting is awesome, Jeff.

    I think I'm going to write a hit single tonight!

    I'll e-mail you the gig deets.

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  5. Yeah and you also tripped me and made me smack myself in the head with my Wii remote. I wrote a song about that. Like to hear it? Here it goes.

    Not sure if it's that or the Vodka that's making my head hurt so much today. Good times.

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  6. Kelly, I have no idea what you are talking about.

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  7. Yeah, you seemed pretty oblivious even at the time. The best part was that smacking myself in the head actually resulted in a Strike. (And yes, we were actually bowling.)

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  8. See?

    This is what good songwriting is all about.

    Maybe you guys should start a band together...

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  9. lioux, Kelly and I had a band together with our friend Jen. We were called Sugar Mandella and the Dew Drops.

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  10. Jeff and I were the Dew Drops. We used to play at the Gazebo at Six Flags Great Adventure. And once we even opened for Tiffany on her mall tour.

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  11. Do any of the *drops* play an electric triangle?

    We're looking to replace the trianglist we have now.

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  12. I don't recall any triangle playing in our band but were all usually so wasted when we performed anything was possible.

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  13. Kelly2:24 PM

    That's me -- the triangle player!! I have zero musical talent and a voice that not even my mother wanted to hear. So in my younger school days, I was always relegated to the triangle. Guess it was better than the choir -- they kicked me out but I still kept showing up and singing. (This is like therapy!)

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  14. Just call me Dr. Lioux...

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  15. Anyone need an Electric Air Guitar player?

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